Moms!

Today is the second sunday in May... which means today is... FISHING OPENER IN MINNESOTA! Oh. And it also means its Mother's Day. Personally I think fishing is boring. I don't have a problem if you want to be a fisherman. But its not for me it just seems like something really boring, sitting in a boat or on shore with a stick. With an invisible string attached. With an odd little thingy at the end, and a very sharp hook only intended to harm other animals. I think its very poopy to have fishing opener the same weekend as Mother's Day. Hopefully no idiot husbands will be out fishing instead of making their wives breakfast in bed (let me clarify that its multiple husbands and their wives - when I proofread this it sounded polygamistic).

Anyway.

I didn't want to rant about how much I don't like fishing. I do want to talk about moms though. What made me start thinking about moms was this email forward:

WHAT I LEARNED FROM MY MOTHER!

1. My mother taught me to appreciate a job well done.
"If you're going to kill each other, do it outside, I just finished cleaning"

2. My mother taught me about religion.
"You better pray that will come out of the carpet"

3. My mother taught me about time travel.
"If you don't straighten up, I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week"

4. My mother taught me about logic.
"Because I said so, that's why!"

5. My mother taught me about more logic.
"If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, you're not going to the store with me."

6. My mother taught me about foresight.
"Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case your in an accident."

7. My mother taught me about irony.
"Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about."

8. My mother taught me about the science of osmosis.
"Shut up and eat your supper."

9. My mother taught me about contortionism.
"Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck!"

10. My mother taught me about stamina.
"You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone."

11. My mother taught me about the weather.
"Your room looks like a tornado went through it."

12. My mother taught me about hypocrisy.
"If I told you once, I've told you a million times. Don't exaggerate!"

13. My mother taught me about the circle of life.
"I brought you into this world, I can take you out"

14. My mother taught me behavior modification.
"Stop acting like your father!"

15. My mother taught me about envy.
"There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do"

16. My mother taught me about anticipation.
"Just wait until we get home"

17. My mother taught me about receiving.
"You are going to get it when we get home.

18. My mother taught me about medical science.
"If you don't stop crossing you're eyes, they're going to freeze that way"

19. My mother taught me about ESP.
"Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you are cold?"

20. My mother taught me humor.
"When the lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me."

21. My mother taught me how to become an adult.
"If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up."

22. My mother taught me genetics.
"You're just like your father."

23. My mother taught me about my roots.
"Shut that door behind you, you weren't born in a barn."

24. My mother taught me wisdom.
"When you get to be my age you'll understand"

And most importantly.
25. My mother taught me justice.
"One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!"

Mothers are extremely important to us. Whether they work in produce at Wal Mart, are welders, or managers. They help us grow into who we are going to be. They have shaped us into who we are. Regardless of how well we get along with them most of us still love them regardless. So give your mom a big hug today, or call her and let her know how sensational she is!